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you mean to tell me that a self transformed this machine elf?

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commenting without faving is a flagrant act of aggression and each time it happens i imagine a council of lab coat'd nerds moving the Doomsday Clock's hand one minute closer to midnight.

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a rat lives under Dave Navarro's fedora and pulls on his hair to make him do the guitar solos good.

okay i'm outta posting juice see you next week stay fresh cheese bags!

one of my least cool musician opinions is that I really like the U2 album Achtung Baby.

if that album were a bit dorkier, this would loop over into a hipster affectation through the force of irony.

but it's merely a kinda uncool album that has a handful of songs i really enjoy.

let's start a late 90s style nu metal band, but we're ALL the superfluous dj.

each of us wearing baggy ass pants and a floppy kangol, standing behind an unnecessary three turntables a piece, just taking turns dropping samples.

blade is filming in Cleveland this fall and they need extras hell yes

I've upgraded my assessment of the new The Mars Volta album to "perfectly fine for the most part, and intermittently good in spots."

me in your dms:

🐕

god damn Max! Dont run off like that. Sorry about that. My dog is a little friendly. Hey whats your name

šatranj was played on an uncheckered 8×8 board (board not pictured; the set below is from iran, 12th century). the king (شاه‎ šâh), the pawns (سرباز sarbâz, 'soldier'), the knight (اسب asb, 'horse'), and the rook (رخ rox, 'chariot') moved as they do in european chess, but there was no castling, initial double move, or en passant capture. the bishop was the elephant (فِيل fil), which moved exactly two squares diagonally, and the queen the counsellor (فرزین‎ farzîn), which moved a single square diagonally. this gave a much slower game where opening theory as such didn't exist, and the rook was overwhelmingly the strongest piece. pawns always promoted to counsellors and a bare king counted as a win

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@cicatriz_jdr
"We're glad you're here, 007. Our latest Intel sugge
"Is it Mumsnet?"
"Excuse me?"
"The Intel. Is it Mumsnet?"
"007, a field agent ascertained th
"Was that you browsing Mumsnet?"
"I hardly see how that's relevant!"
"I'm not running surveillance on the women's bathroom at Nando's aga
"I COULD BE KILLED!"

new cdc guidelines say that you can only defederate from monads and myasstodon if you beat our 8 strongest warriors at tekken

gothed up on the balcony again with iced coffee, weed, and a flawless makeup day

ec

dreamt i got abducted by aliens in some fuckin bryce 3D lookin orb space ship and the lesson here is to not look in the sky and go "haha sweet" when you see a menacing orb

i'm the guy that game developers call in to write the description text for food items in JRPGs. if you've ever scrolled through your inventory to see if you have something to buff up elemental resistances before a tough boss fight, and read a line of text like "this parfait is light and refreshing. a rejuvenating treat!"

i wrote that.

weed strains are named shit like "cock punch OG" and the description will be "combining cock suckers delight and purple punch alongside OG kush to create this insane indica dominant strain that will enlighten you, make you murder a police officer, invite new types of demons into your home, and make your balls fall clean off and roll into the nearest sewer grate. 3% say it helped with their anxiety" and i'll go "looks good it says indica"

this is one of those sites where someone called 'pussy like a beyblade' with a profile picture of a north korea themed anime girl will tell you your game is weak

I would simply go on a journey that resolves with absolution from the sins of the father. it would be easy for me. i'm just built different.

me: Sorry, wrong number.

me, internally panicking: WAIT. am i /certain/ i’m not the Paul that’s coming by with the new door???

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