Official Devil Wife™️ @ItsMorgan@myasstodon.xyz

Good morning

good morning worms (i am _cool_ with worms, this is _not_ derogatory)

@ItsMorgan

I am discriminated against on the fedi verse for not having irritable bowel syndrome

By Avishek Banerjee
https://www.artstation.com/artwork/nQbqPe

baby i’m amazed at the way you’re puppy all the time

playing openttd with my girlfriend because we love public transport so much

karl marx was a thirsty bitch thats my headcanon

Marx and Engels totally fucked

Me, the man who lies down the cones in the night, maniacally: "I decide how wide the street is! Hahahaha!"

Local Florida man begins paying attention, realizes that the government may not have his interests at heart

Dante is a twink

Dante: "V-virgil.... there's still one more ring we need to explore"
Virgil: "What do you mean dear Dante? we have gone through all the layers of hell... together"
Dante: *Dante takes Virgil's hand* "I know.... but I know of one last place we haven't been... together"

and then they fuck

“Apparently, when observing current children, we compare our biased memory of the past to a more objective assessment of the present, and a natural decline seems to appear. This can explain why the kids these days effect has been happening for millennia.“

@gonzo Let her run

watching a simpsons episode that has milhouse in it and going "ahhh, thats my online friend snake boy"

Batman: "You are the CatWomen."
CatWomen: "Yup."
Batman: "Do not steal any cats."
CatWomen: "Too late, bathole." *steals every cat*
Bathole: WTF!

Batman (punching the door): "Jokker, Panguin, open this door!"
Jokker: "No"
Panguin: "Caw Caw"
Batman (shooting the door with the bat gun): "Open the door now, Riddles!"
Riddles: "Riddle this, you. What has teeth but zero tooths?"
Batman: "Shut up"
Riddles: "No"